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A Hell of a roller coaster... [message #8495] Thu, 28 January 2016 01:11
iWindoze  is currently offline iWindoze
Messages: 172
Registered: September 2002
Location: USA
Senior Member
I'm currently working a job where I suddenly find myself behind a computer waiting for a phone to ring which rarely does, so I wait. I wait a lot. Unfortunately there is no internet access to outside but fortunately there is email and I am allowed to email myself stuff to read... I've decided to re-read the Tucky Saga.

Holy shit, I'd forgotten what a roller coaster the saga is. Reeling from hysterical laughter to dolorous depression and anger sometimes within the same chapter. I don't know if I was just remembering the happier parts or if I'd just blocked out the bad stuff somehow. It could even be that maybe I grew up somewhat between the time I began reading and now have a bit more empathy? I don't know.

I didn't remember how much Tuck hurt from everything happening around him and to him. How much it pained him to simply ask to be left alone as he was and not have to choose to fit into preconceived notions of gender. I actually saw beyond the fantasy possibilities of the Tuck\Valerie\Debbie\Lisa triangle and saw how unsteady that relationship was for the first time. I saw how much they both hurt. And how much Tuck's refusal or inability to stand up to her destroyed the relationship, just as much as Debbie's insecurities and Lisa's need for Debbie at the exclusion of all else.

I'm still only about 2/3 the way through but reading it all in one go has opened my eyes a bit to how much foreshadowing there was in the series to later events thematically. I'm blown away.

I really wish there would be more written but I understand why after nineteen years it might be more and more difficult to be the character, to see and empathize with him after so much has changed around me. I've seen it before with a fanfic writer who spent some ten years or more writing his stories after which he had to tie it off and quit because the character he was writing seemed unrelatable to him after becoming such a different person. I only wish that the Saga and Tucky Seasons had managed to be complete first.

Still as Ellen warns us in the commentary to part 29, "Hopefully, by this time, anyone who thinks that this series will end up in a mindlessly happy ending has left." It was increasingly unlikely that there would be a happy ending or resolution we would all be happy with. Maybe in the original draft of Tucky Seasons there could be the semblance of a happy ending (at least a hint towards one) but that was a fanfic, by nature not required to be realistic. Ditto for the Bikini Beach interlude taking place after or between the acts there.

One thing I was surprised about was the lack of magic in the series. It often seemed like Ellen was hinting at there being deeper events taking place, with the relationship between Tuck and Mike and the blood oaths, some sort of urban fantasy just waiting to bubble up through the side door.... It never seemed to gel on screen though, always in the background with things left unsaid. Oh well, Tuck never promised us he was a reliable narrator.

Regardless, I've enjoyed (am enjoying) this trip through the story again. I thank you Ellen for sharing it with us and I appreciate and thank the rest of my fellow tuckerspawn for sharing it with me.

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